In my next episode of Eavesdrop, I’m in conversation with the founder of Recess Living, Nina Elegba.
In this interview, we discuss:
- Entrepreneurship
- Overcoming burnout
- Seasonal self-care
- Embracing ‘holiday moments’ each day
Here’s a brief recap of our conversation. To hear the full conversation, give my podcast a follow on Podbean, Spotify, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts!
An Interview With Nina Elegba
Do you think it’s possible to find balance? Is it a thing, work-life balance?
“I don’t think work-life balance is a thing. So I’ve taken to removing the word ‘balance’ and using the word ‘harmony’ instead.”
“So I feel like, especially in the well-being context, we put so much additional pressure on ourselves to try and balance out all our parts equally, because that’s what balance really is, it’s about the sum of equal parts. But it’s never equal.”
“As well, we’re cyclical beings. We tune into mother nature in different seasons and that also filters through to life into work. So for me, it’s about trying to find harmony and giving myself self-compassion – and just like the seasons change around us, so does my mental health and well-being, and so do the cycles of my business.”
“So just allowing that space and knowing that the parts will never be equal, but that is okay. It’s what I strive to do and then help others do through the work that we do with my company, Recess Living.”
Tell us about Recess Living. We want to know all about it!
“Recess Living is a wellness events company. We create experiences, such as creative workshops, all centred around cultivating connection. So, giving people the tools they can use to prioritize rest.”
“For me, I really love to tune into creative well-being and harness the power of mindfulness through making – I always say, when your hands are busy, your mind becomes calm. So I’ve really tuned into art psychotherapy, and mindfulness as well, and kind of looking at how we can fuse those two together. Because art is such an amazing tool and language we have at our disposal to use.”
“A lot of our experiences are geared around the active side of wellness and meditation, which still helps find that inner like calm and connectedness.”
Wow. So tell me about life before Recess Living.
“So I grew up personally and professionally in the television industry in the UK. So since I was like eight, I was like, that’s it – I’m going into TV and film. And everything I did from then on was kind of geared to that goal which I achieved and I worked in the industry for just under 20 years. It was such an amazing experience, nothing beats being able to go behind that curtain and learn about the magic of storytelling, filmmaking, video, and creativity like in that industry.”
“But it’s an industry that is very fast-paced, it’s high pressure. So yeah, my relationship with burnout grew as I moved through the industry. I kind of learned about how much we need to prioritize rest from doing the complete opposite and not prioritizing rest.”
“So for me, that then manifested in burnout and stress and anxiety. And it’s through some lower seasons of mental health where I was completely burnt out, experiencing depression at that time, I started to look for different ways that I could just self-regulate and kind of… bring myself back up to feeling what felt good for me and felt in alignment for me.”
“I started looking into other forms of meditation because I think back then, it was very much like traditional, seated meditation. But I just couldn’t gel with that, there was something about sitting still in silence that I was just like, absolutely not.”
“And even back then, I suppose I was sceptical about things like reflexology, soundbar, sound healing – which are all things that I do now on a regular basis. So going through that journey with burnout and anxiety, and looking for different experiences outside of the fitness space, is what led me onto this journey with Recess Living.”
“It was really interesting for me because I worked in such a creative field – but when I was doing it, I was working in more of like production management. So it was very logistical minded and it’s almost like I forgot to tap into the innate creativity that is within me.”
“So it was through exploring things like pottery and marbling, kind of doing them as hobbies. I was really beginning to see this connection in terms of like busying my hands and making my mind still. And it just set me off from there, I was like this is such an amazing gift that we have. Why are we not using it more?”
“And that became like my mantra. I saw the benefits, I wanted to help more people experience the benefits of it. And yeah, long story short, six years later, Recess finally came out.”
I know it’s not great delving back into the harder parts of your life, but I’m just wondering – how did you know that you were feeling burned out?
“For me, I was definitely feeling that tiredness. But at the same time, I was wired and tired. So, my sleep just went completely untoward. I’m quite a deep thinker anyway, but when my deep thinking goes into overthinking, and that rumination, and that brain chatter becomes so noisy and so loud – that for me is signalling I need to rest. I’m on that brink of burnout.”
“Other ways it came up was just that disconnection. I’ve always kind of been in that role where you’re a leader, you’re like the caretaker within the workplace. And I really get a lot joy in being able to help others. But when I know I’m approaching burnout is kind of when I’m feeling that disconnection between the joy and the helping.”
So what’s one piece of advice that you would give to a founder, or someone experiencing burnout who wants to do something different?
“Oh, that’s a great question! My first step would be to start keeping an energy management diary. So basically start writing down all the tasks that you’re doing. Whether you’ve got a team or not, you’re still wearing many hats. So start writing down a list of all the tasks that you have to do, and start noting down on a scale of one to five, how energized you’re feeling as you’re doing those tasks.”
“Then, look at how you move through your energy throughout the day. So like, do you have the most optimum energy in the morning like I do? If so, then the mornings are for deep work and tasks where you can show up with your full presence.”
“I think we have a misconception that the day starts on 100 and we just keep on taking out of it throughout the day. But we can do things to top that bank up. So it might be movement, it might be meditation, it might be having like 20 minutes where you just have a little bit of a colouring session. For me, getting my pencils out resets my brain and sets my mood again.”
“And if Mondays aren’t your favourite days, and the business allows for you to have a half day on a Monday – then do it. There are no rules anymore. You don’t have to be at your desk at nine o’clock. If actually you’re getting at your desk at 3 pm in the afternoon, and you work a little bit later in the day, that flexibility and compassion with yourself is key.”
“For me, the best way to start building that up is to start with an energy management diary. So you’ve got that data that you can then kind of use for yourself.”
That is brilliant. I am definitely going to do that! I try really hard to have ‘holiday moments’ every single day. Because I think, well, what do I love to do on holiday? I eat good food. I swim. I walk. I read. Can I do those things in my normal everyday life? Even for 10 minutes? And that way I don’t go bust. I’m kind of keeping that flow of rest, relaxation and work and that just feels more balanced to me.
“Yeah, and that’s the key, isn’t it? Like with self-care, the first word in that is ‘self’. So you have to really tune into what works best for you. You can’t copy/paste someone else’s self-care routine and think it’s gonna work exactly like that for yourself.”
“But also at different seasons of your life, you can’t also copy and paste your own self-care routine. So the more you can build a bigger toolbox and fill it with those amazing ‘holiday moments’, then you can use them at different seasons of life.”
I love what you’re saying about seasonal self-care. Can you talk to me a little bit more about how you practically do that?
“So for me, I’m very much governed by light. So the heat isn’t with us at all times in the UK summer season. The fact that light is, is great.”
“So this season right now, my body basically wakes me up by half past six. So right now in the summer season, it looks like getting up and getting out first thing in the morning. So I either go for a morning walk along the canal near me, or I go to the gym. And I’m really lucky because our gym has an outdoor swimming pool. So I can kind of have that full ‘holiday moment’, a connection with the water, the light, if the sun’s with us, the heat as well. And then I do my meditation and everything like that outdoors while I can.”
“In the autumn and winter seasons, I tend to do more snuggly, self-care moments first. So I start off in bed, reading, and I’ll do my meditation in bed. So just being able to flip those things, like right now I’ve got my menu of things I love to do for self-care, and on there would be reading, meditating, some form of creativity and connection, journaling, and I just try and move through the day as best I can. But if I don’t hit them all off in one day, that’s okay.”
“I think the other problem we sometimes have with self-care is that we think it should take hours – but sometimes you might only have like 5-10 minutes to yourself, and you’ll be like, oh okay I’m just going to forget it and not do anything. But actually, you can still meditate in five minutes, you could do a bullet list or brain dump.”
“I also really love using aromatherapy – and sometimes if I’ve got a really busy day, but I made sure I started off the morning with a two-minute meditation and I’ve done my aromatherapy oil, like that’s still a beautiful micro self-care moment that’s gonna set me up in the day better than if I’ve not done it at all.”
So in terms of being a founder and starting your own business, what people have you had around you that have really helped nurture and support you to grow what you’ve grown?
“I have an amazing group of friends and amazing family who are on the front line with me. And especially, I always have to shout out my friend Malaika who’s also a fellow founder, she runs an amazing jewellery company called Chalk Jewellery.”
“She has been instrumental in terms of like, how Recess is in the world today. Because she helped me find the confidence. If it wasn’t for her support and her guidance and some tough love, I think the shape of the business might have looked slightly different.”
“I’m really lucky that I’ve got a great mix of friends who are in the eye of the storm, and also founders as well.”
Where can people find out more about you?
“So our new digital home is over at www.recessliving.com, and then you can find us on Instagram, and LinkedIn. I’m also on LinkedIn as Nina Elegba as well.”
Catch the Full Episode!
This was just a snippet of my conversation with Nina! You can download and listen to the full episode by following the links below:
- Podbean: S5E4 – Work Life Harmony With Nina Elegba
- Spotify: S5E4 – Work Life Harmony With Nina Elegba
- iTunes: S5E4 – Work Life Harmony With Nina Elegba
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Further Resources on Work-Life Balance and Burnout
If you found this interview helpful, check out these additional recommended resources on authenticity, bravery, and self-care:
- Harvard Business Review’s article, 4 Steps to Beating Burnout
- Burnout resource from Mental Health UK
- Work-Life Balance resource from The Mental Health Foundation
- The Lily-Jo Project’s self-care resource
- The Lily-Jo Project’s article, The Science of Self-Care
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